It happens often, with me ... that I think I shall do something, but keep procrastinating ... till a time comes when I almost forget I was going to do something ... And, then suddenly, one fine day, I feel like doing it ... or maybe, do it, without having a feeling to do it ...
Am I blabbering a bit too much? Well ... I guess I do that all the time ... usually, when I want to kill time or hide something ....
But why exactly am I blabbering now? I have no time to kill ... am overworked at office, spend a couple of hours travelling to and from office, and then have to play "You're Dead!" with my son ... which takes up quite some time .... Which all adds up to the simple fact that I have no time to kill.
Then ... what is it that I am hiding? Sadness ... frustration ... dejection ... life's unfairness .... there's just too much I am hiding ... but from whom? The world? Or myself? Yes ... I am hiding from the world ... Oh no! Not myself ... I am very much me to the world, maybe a masked me ... But I am there ....
But hiding from myself? Can someone hide from themselves? Isn't it such a weird thing ... trying to hide from your own self? I asked myself all this .... because I felt that maybe I was losing it ... but then, when I asked myself the question, I realized that I actually had a mask ... that tried to hide everything from me .... the heart hides things from the mind and the mind hides things from the heart .... but, then again, they clash somewhere .... the heart dreams on but tells the mind "be practical!" ... the mind tries to follow the tenet of practicality, but in some intimate portion, dreams on ....
It is this juxtaposition that actually made me write down these words ... to begin a blog that I have been thinking I'd begin for ages now .... I did something without an inclination to do ... just did it .... I don't even know that I shall keep it up ... but I just did it ... for the sake of it ....
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